This one is a low budget crime/thriller/comedy/horror film from Director Kit Ryan and is as convoluted as the genre mix suggests.
The premise is this: a diamond robbery goes badly wrong at the getaway stage, leaving the main character ‘Ritchie’ played by Stephen Dorff sans haul and in bad fettle. His crime boss ‘Groznyi’ played by Sean Pertwee is unimpressed with the failed heist, and since Ritchie owes him big time for a family debt, dispatches him to Russia to retrieve an ancient crucifix from a skyscraper block in Moscow. It is here he teams up with the barking mad Peter and his Brother Yuri, played by Jamie Foreman, and Russell Smith respectively. To date it seems like a pretty standard crime film, yes? Hold on to your pants, because now the surreal part kicks in. The gang of three and a number of other passengers get stuck on the 13th floor of the building, where Ritchie assumes they have been trapped by Security, but the hostages they take start to die in a gory (but sometimes funny) manner.
Cue absolute mayhem, as we see a dancing, sword wielding maniac, his twin sister who is psychotic, human skin walls and pictures, decapitation, impaling, secret panels, a hidden control monitoring centre, and a great deal of blood. If you ever wondered what an episode of Scooby Doo would be like with no holds barred, this is it brought to life. However, there are places where, when the heavy-handed bloodiness subsides, the heart of a half decent idea lurks, the trouble is it never gets beating for any great length of time, and we are left with the gory spectacle and no substance. It is original for sure, in some places weird beyond the pale, it’s a shame that the zaniness is not matched by more atmosphere and aided by moody music and lighting, then again perhaps that is its strength. Watch out for Boris, the groups self proclaimed hero and ungainly oaf, his one liners are worthy of repeat.
5.5/10, Botched is one of those movies that I had no preconceived notions of, and no real expectations, and I was quite amused as a result. That is probably the best way to approach the madcap frenzy you are presented with, I watched this almost back to back with Will Ferrell’s Semi-Pro, and I know it’s this one I’d watch again!