The week got off a bad start. The mighty reds lots to “them”. How could they? Of all the teams to lose to, it HAD to be “them”. The lads must have been celebrating my release for too long. Still my voodoo doll came to good effect to see “them” getting spanked midweek. More of the same this weekend please ….

Then Jug Ears went to tidy the garage. Jolly decent of him I thought, until he uttered the words that put more fear into me than the chemist telling me he was out of KY. “I made a deal with Don to get you out”. Of all the people to bargain with, I’d rather he made a deal with Alex Ferguson than that thug.

Don turned up a couple of days later and informed us that there would be a delivery this week and he hoped we had plenty of space. I asked what it would take for us to be even and he said “even you two couldn’t afford it”. Looks like I’ll have to put my thinking cap on to get out of this one.

I have spend a lot of time in the garden this week. The harsh winter weather and my time away has left both Stevie G and Fernando looking a little unkempt. Fernando’s face needs a lot of TLC to be finished and Stevie G has seen better days. I started by spending a day concentrating on his groin and bush to see if that would perk him up. As far as gardening goes, I face an uphill task getting both in pristine condition for the summer, but then again I am familiar with that ……

I’m getting a little better now, but I am not ready to either recollect the events that happened in captivity or release my diary of my time incarcerated. I am hoping doing some predictions will help my recovery. Any way, my thoughts were

Sunderland v Tottenham Hotspur.

Sunderland thought they were free of the fight at the bottom but the results from midweek has left them still in trouble.

Spurs will be up for the game after beating “them” in midweek and a win for them would see them finally clear of trouble. Draw, and was I right? Oh yes.

Prediction : 1-1

Coventry City v Chelsea (KO 12:15)

Coventry put out Blackburn in the last round and will be looking for a full house to cheer them on against Chelsea. However their league form has been patchy to say the least.

Chelsea look totally revitalised under Hiddink and will be chasing at least one piece of silverware this season. No shock here, it’s an away win. And again, got it right. This punting is easy.

Prediction : 0-2

Fulham v Manchester United (KO 17:15)

Fulham have suffered a slump in league form over the past few weeks, and that is not the form to be meeting United in.

United are still chasing 5 trophies this season following their Carling Cup win last week and are in red hot form. I cannot see any other outcome but an away win. Well Man Utd did it better than I thought, actual result 0-4, I said………

Prediction : 1-2

Arsenal v Burnley (Sunday, KO 13:30)

Arsenal are suddenly back in Champions League contention following Villa’s bad week but Wenger will be desperate for a trophy at the Emarites.

Burnley have had a long season and were very unlucky not to make the Carling Cup Final. They are on the edge of the play offs and this will be their priority. If a shock was going to happen anywhere I feel it would be here, but I am going for Arsenal.

Prediction : 2-1

Everton v Middlesbrough (Sunday 16:00)

Everton are so strong at home at the moment and the fact that 6th place in the league is a UEFA Cup place has taken the pressure right off for this game.

“They” were battered in midweek after their fluke win last week. I could not face the thought of “them” at Wembley so I say the same prayers I said at this time last year and be cheering for the blue half of Merseyside.

Prediction : 3-0